Rough Patch

 Dave showing his strut at the zoo 11-7

I try to keep my blogs uplifting despite the serious situation but sometimes it just isn’t possible. I haven’t written for awhile because not only have I been struggling with my health but Dave hit a major rough patch last weekend and all my energies have gone towards helping him recover. We have been told plenty of times that his recovery will be a roller coaster but it doesn’t stop discouragement when things go south.

Sleep, or lack of it, has become the greatest enemy. Plain and simple: without adequate sleep his progress is impeded. Directly after Dave’s stroke he began the battle of a good night’s rest and so far he is not winning. His restless leg syndrome, which was managed before, has become ridiculously out of control. Every evening about 7 his leg tremors begin to shake his recliner like a train rattling down the tracks. This continues throughout the night. We have tried new meds, acupuncture, sleeping pills, and I even bought a heating blanket for the bed but to no avail. It interrupts his sleep patterns and leaves him bleary and tired the next morning.

       NUMBER ONE IMPORTANT for stroke recovery is GOOD SLEEP!!!

I am hoping with time his tremors will subside but meanwhile I am open to any suggestions. This morning upon waking I even considered medical marijuana…hmmm…need to think seriously about this. I might be onto something!

Last weekend should have been a good one for him. My brother took him to a Husky basketball game and his sister came down from the mountains where she lives and spent the weekend. He moved only when he had to and his normally determined demeanor faded. He refused to eat much and didn’t do any of his therapies. I was concerned! Many times he would utter “I don’t care” when I tried to motivate him. But what scared me the most were 4 simple words: “I want to die”. Although he only muttered it once it showed me the depths of his despair that night. Logically I know that this is probably not an uncommon reaction but the anguish it elicited in me was acute!

I decided a change of scenery was due. On Monday morning I loaded Dave and Homer (our trusty Weiner dog) into the car and drove up to the family sanctuary on Whidbey Island, bringing our grandson along for comic diversion. We cranked the heat up in the condominium overlooking the beach and Dave spent a good deal of the day napping and resting while I frolicked on the beach with Ashton and Homer, went to the local park and made cupcakes.

On Tuesday he seemed to have snapped out of it and in his speech therapy that day “Kara the Magnificent” came up with a battle plan that we are enacting this week. It may take some time to address some of the issues we outlined but it feels good to have a list to tackle! I grew up in a family of list makers so this is right up my alley! Now the goal is to get all of us healthy enough to focus directly on these matters. Dave came down with the head cold that is going around and I have an anchor sitting on my chest and a dry cough. What a household we make! Now if only Homer had opposable thumbs!

One of the activities we both enjoyed before the stroke was playing a canasta card game called “Hand and Foot”. Over the years we have taught many people how to play this social card game. I was anxious to have Dave try and play this again, especially after he showed me he is could play cribbage. Last weekend with his sister here I was dismayed when he refused to play. But this past Wednesday we received a visit from the DuValls, friends that we have fanatically played this game with for over 15 years. He finally gave it a go and found out that he is capable of playing it!!! I am sure it eases his mind knowing he can be competent at something he loved before. This milestone will encourage him to move onward and give him reasons to stay on this path of healing and rehabilitation!!